The Cul-de-Sac Llama Has Better Credit Than You

Spotted on the local “What’s that smell?” message board: A missing llama is currently wandering through a gated community in Yorba Linda. While residents argue over whether to call Animal Control or offer it a craft beer, the llama has been seen calmly inspecting the landscaping of a $3-million-dollar Mediterranean villa. The llama, which neighbors have nicknamed “Larry,” seems entirely unimpressed by the neighborhood’s architectural committee. He was recently seen chewing on a prize-winning hydrangea with a level of stoicism that most residents haven’t achieved since the 2008 market crash. Early reports suggest the llama is actually looking to buy the property, and his all-cash offer looks better than most.